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Spence

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It was more than few years ago I was scratching out a living pushing a mop at MIT. You know, running around with my buddies, chasing skirts, drinking beer and hassling Barneys.

So, it was out of sheer boredom that I completed that “unsolvable” theorem written on a hallway chalkboard. After all, I was always good at arithmetic, what you less geniusey-types refer to as “math.” (Between you and I, I thought I was doing a Soduku.) Who knew?

Anyway, my therapist, Sean, who was total doppelgänger for Robin Williams, wanted one thing for me. Professor Lambeau wanted another. He repeatedly told me to call him Gerry and would call me, drunk, and invite me to his place to show me his “Fields Medal.” He’d say over and over, “It’s really big and impressive.” Whatever.

I decided to follow Sean’s advice. I left behind several lucrative job offers to follow this girl, Skylar, to Stanford University. I’d only gone out with her, like, three times. She had freckles, I think and she thought she could play in the NBA. Bitch, please!?!?

I hopped in my beater, that my boys bought me for my 21st birthday, and headed west. Unfortunately, the POS broke down outside of Goshen, Indiana. I just stayed there. I eventually got a gig doing nights on Goshen College radio. (Go Leafs!!!)

I eventually did make it out west, albeit not to California, but to Las Vegas where I now co-host the Chet Buchanan & the Morning Zoo radio program. In addition, I write and produce comedy that airs nationally through Delicious Audio.

So you know, I haven’t completely gotten out of the math game. I’ve been known to balance an occasional check book and during tax time I do a little part-time work at Walmart in the Jackson-Hewitt kiosk.

Today, when people ask me, “How do I like them apples?” I respond, “In a pie with a golden brown flaky crust and maybe a dollop of Cool Whip.”

– Spence

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The 14 Most Lethal Revenge Songs

Revenge has always been big business, but thanks to Beyonce’s “Lemonade”, it just became huge business. In honor of the new album, E! Online put together a list of the 14 Most Lethal Revenge Songs. […]

98.5 KLUC–04/28/2016

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Game of Thrones: Fact or Full of It

It’s time for “Fact or Full of It.” We give you a statement, and you decide FACT, it’s true…or FULL OF IT, it’s total B.S. “Game of Thrones” season six premiered last night on HBO, so that’s the topic.

98.5 KLUC–04/25/2016

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Celebs React to the Passing of Prince

The world is in mourning with the discovery of the death of musical innovator and legend Prince. Prince Rogers Nelson was found dead at his Paisley Park residence this morning at the age of 57.

98.5 KLUC–04/21/2016

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The Most Important Food Innovation From Each State

America may not be good at inventing food, but we’re fantastic at taking food that already exists and making it better.

98.5 KLUC–04/21/2016

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It’s a Trump Parody of Biebs’ “Love Yourself”

Spence has been fairly vocal about his dislike of Donald Trump. So, it will come as no surprise that Spence parodied the would be Republican presidential nominee.

98.5 KLUC–04/18/2016

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Most Vegetarians Are Meatists

Approximately 94% of being in a relationship is figuring out what you’re going to eat. So it makes sense that you should have the same basic philosophy on food if you’re going to make it work. I guess.

98.5 KLUC–04/14/2016

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News From My Hometown

I spent my formative years in Grass Valley, California. It’s in the heart of gold country, about an hour away from Sacramento. I guess it was kind of a big deal back in the days of the “Gold Rush.” Yeah, the 1850’s.

98.5 KLUC–04/11/2016

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Spence’s Song of the Week

Each week on Friday at 8:05, we debut a new, original “Song of the Week.” This week took the totes ridic usage of abbreviations in social media and conversation and put it on blast. Please enjoy “Abbrevs.” Your perfs and we love you forevs.

98.5 KLUC–04/09/2016

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10 Things That Make People Think You’re Creepy

In case you’re creeping other people out, we found a scientific study that’s going to be useful. Not for me…I’m suave and amazing…for OTHER people.

98.5 KLUC–04/08/2016

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Ten Things That Annoy Your Co-Workers

We found a list online of the top ten things you shouldn’t do at work, because they might annoy your co-workers. Or if you HATE you co-workers, you can do these more I guess.

98.5 KLUC–04/06/2016

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